No Air.

I am suffocating a little.

Mentally, I didn't think I was.

I thought I was doing just fine.

But lately, my body has been telling me otherwise.

I cannot seem to ever get enough air into my lungs.

I am constantly catching up with myself. 

Skipping a heart beat,

checking my pulse and reminding myself that

No, I did not actually just run a marathon

Though I could have sworn I did.

There is a burning in my chest that travels up to my throat,

accompanied with a dizzy head,

and a hot, busy, anxious heart.

I have never been more aware of my breathing, 

or lack thereof.

Its just a little 

anxiety

I know.

I know it is natural, normal, considering all the changes that are coming in the next 10 weeks,

and also considering the load I put on myself

to get there so fast.

I also know that because it is not affecting my daily life-

I am still pushing forward-

it is not dangerously interfering.

and yet....

I could use some help.

I don't know how many read my blog or how often, but if these words meet your eyes,

remember me in your prayers.

Or,

at least,

send me some light and love every time you think about me.

Love, love. 

ps Erika - thanks for the encouragement already. You're sweet and wonderful.