My First Trimester

My whole first trimester I really wanted to be pampered. I wanted everyone to know I was pregnant so that everyone would ask me how I was feeling and then I could whine to them. Yep, I was that pathetic.

 But I also wanted to make sure we (me and the baby) made it through the first trimester before sharing the news with everyone. So mostly I just whined to my mom, my sister-in-law(s), and, of course, Adam. 

My mom is the best sport ever. She would text me everyday to ask how I was feeling and everyday I would say something really exciting in response, like, 

"Oh I just threw up my applesauce," 

"Saltines aren't working anymore," 

or "Don't even get me started on the raw ground beef in the refrigerator."

And then she would send something sympathetic back, and I'd feel a little better.

Some days I didn't believe that Adam believed me when I said I wasn't feeling too well. I would always throw up just after he got in the shower, or after he had already left for work, and then by the time he got home from work I'd just be starting to feel better and I'd be hyper from sleeping and lounging all day. But he's really been a good sport, too. He helps me wobble out of bed when my back hurts too bad for me to stand up on my own, and he buys me Taco Bell when nothing else sounds good, and he takes the trash out so I don't have to smell it. 

Now I'm getting into my 2nd trimester and the last few days I've noticed a slight improvement. I don't throw up in front of passing cars when I pick up Kaleo's poo outside anymore, I have been able to stay up much later than I could during my first trimester (meaning 10pm instead of 7pm), and I even woke up this morning at 8am, after only getting 10 hours of sleep instead of my usual 12+ hours.

So, I wanted to outline some of symptoms and when I started feeling them. This is mostly for my own record, but also for anyone curious or wanting someone to compare their pregnancy to. Sorry if it's TMI, but really, we're talking about pregnancy here, so you should probably just get used to it or come back later :)

Week 3: Didn't know we were pregnant yet, but I did notice that my boobs hurt a trillion times worse than they ever have before - way  more than normal PMS. I couldn't even lay on my side with my arm resting against me without pain. This was my first clue. 

My next clue, and this one is embarrassing, was... I wet the bed! A grown woman! I was so embarrassed when I woke up and had to tell Adam but he was just like, whatever, put a towel over it. I was mortified. And I had NO idea what was wrong with me. 

Week 4: Just found out we were pregnant, super excited. I weighed 136.5 lbs. This first week I wasn't sick at all, but I stopped craving sweets and started craving SALT! This week I gladly ate tater tots w/ ketchup, french fries, pickles, hamburgers, pizza, raman noodles, chips, and chicken smothered in Frank's hot sauce. I did have some slight cramping, with occassional sharp, shooting pains on either sides of my lower abdomen. It worried me some, but I never bled so I assumed it was part of normal stretching. 

This one was weird - I started walking up every half hour it seemed like in the middle of the night, and I'd have to toss and turn and completely arch my back to stretch my belly out. I would do this several times throughout the night. I felt like I'd been doing a thousand crunches every night in my sleep and my abs would be sore and tight in the morning. 

Week 5: This is when the nausea began to kick in.  I would get hungry fast - within an hour after eating. It was like my metabolism quadrupled. I was always looking for food, but suddenly not much was sounding good anymore. I was beginning to get very sensitive when my belly was empty, and needed to put something in there ASAP. Still sore breasts, always feeling bloated and gassy (poor Adam).

I still wasn't sleeping well; Tossing and turning, and I'd be up 2-4 times a night peeing - I had to start limiting my water intake after 4pm. 

Pregnancy glow? Beautiful skin? Not me. I'm breaking out like my high school days. 

Weeks 6-8: I was still trying to nanny, and it was miserable. I was extremely sensitive not just to hunger, smells and sight of food, but also just the mere thought of a particular food could send me gagging over the kitchen sink. Deciding what to eat and when became a literal torture - but I couldn't stay hungry because that just made it worse. I would wait as long as I possibly could before eating, and then I'd be so starving - I never felt good. 

I started having severe back pain - I couldn't turn over with the strength of my abs or back alone, I had to use my arms to pick myself up and move. I was exhausted everyday from getting up early and not sleeping well at night. 

I also was constantly worrying about the baby. I was always looking up stuff online to make sure a silly symptom was normal. I hadn't had my first appointment yet, and so I felt silly even telling my parents I was pregnant (my dad asked me how I knew I was pregnant  if I hadn't had a doctor's appointment yet. "Um...I got a positive on a home pregnancy test? I haven't had a period in the last 6 weeks? And I'm sick everyday? Isn't that enough?") I felt like I needed to take a test every other day just to make sure it was still in there (I didn't. I stopped after two). 

Weeks 9-12: I still felt very sick everyday, and absolutely no motivation whatsoever. After three weeks of constant nausea, it begins to get old. I stopped feeling like myself and gave up on all projects or goals I had. I didn't want to look at the computer screen or read or cook or move. I was just glad to be home and wearing pajamas. Adam made a comment about the ward thinking I was some sort of social recluse, and that's exactly how I felt. 

At week 9 I started taking belly pictures and writing a journal entry/letter to the baby.

I realize I have to give up ice cream. It makes me wayyyy too mucusy, and then I'm swallowing mucus all day and that alone makes me puke. 

My clothes were starting to get tighter - I felt fat trying to wear any of my normal outfits. I put away my skinny jeans and my high-waisted zip-up skirts, only kept out my "fat jeans," and flowy dresses. I started using the rubber-band trick on my jeans, and only wearing really long loose fitting t-shirts. 

I had my first doctor's appointment at week 10, and got to hear the baby's heartbeat. This was such a relief and a comfort. I started telling more extended family members. A few days later I had a scare when my thyroid levels came back low (I have hypothyroidism - have dealt with it since I was 12, and something I was trying hard to monitor since finding out I was pregnant) and my obgyn told me he wanted me to see a high-risk specialist. Just those words alone scared me and I freaked myself out for the next week and a half before seeing him.

At the end of week 12 met with the specialist - I weighed 141.4. We had our first sonogram, and we got to see our baby moving and kicking, and while we were watching both Adam and I felt like it was a little boy (we find out for sure December 20). The specialist calmed our fears and gave me a new prescription and some advice, and we decided it would be safe to share the news!

Week 13: I have started feeling up to my usual 30 minute walk with Kaleo in the morning again (something I had long been shirking). I've been writing my novel, taking more pictures, starting more projects, and cooking more meals. I've been much more social lately. I still get sick, but I can feel my energy levels coming back. I've been sleeping much better at night - not waking up as much and not peeing as much, and I've noticed a decrease in my back pain. I'm starting to get a bit of a pooch in the front, though to other people I probably just look a little chunky. 

So now that I'm caught up with the weeks, I'll probably do weekly updates. I found this fun weekly survey that I might post every couple weeks just for fun, along with a photo. 

How far along? Almost 14 weeks

Total weight gain/loss: Almost 5 pounds! Yikes!
Maternity clothes? Not yet.
Stretch marks? No, but I'm sure they're coming
Sleep: Getting better.
Best moment this week: Going public with the news! Everyone has been so excited for us and it makes us even more excited.
Miss Anything? Eating raw cookie dough and deli meat
Movement: Nope. Just pretending.
Food cravings: Still salty and meaty and proteiny.
Anything making you queasy or sick: Smells - bathroom, garbage, dog poo, raw meat
Have you started to show yet:  I'm getting bigger, but probably not because of the Lemon-sized (3.4 inches, 1.5 oz) baby in me, but because of gas and some extra pounds :)
Gender: Nothing for sure. Intuition says boy.
Labor Signs: Nope.
Belly Button in or out? Still very much in
Wedding rings on or off? On, and loose - like normal.
Happy or Moody most of the time: Usually quite happy, lately.
Looking forward to: Feeling the first movement/ starting to show more.

I'm Pregnant!

(if you haven't already heard, or guessed, as I'm sure some of you have...)

and that my friends is why I quit my job. 

My job required me getting up at 530 am to take care of Kaleo, drop Adam off at his shuttle, and then drive to work and arrive there by 7:30am, where I stayed until 4:30, sometimes later. For 9 hours I would watch 2 boys, ages 3 and 2, who both were slow in their development. This meant I couldn't understand a word the 3 year old was saying, and the 2 year old wasn't even talking. Then I would pick Adam up, and we wouldn't get home until almost 530pm. By then we'd both be so tired we ended up eating frozen pizza on paper plates most nights.

I was getting paid such a tiny amount in comparison to Adam, for such a long day and so much work, that it just wasn't even worth it anymore. What was I doing it for anyway? Something to do during the day? A way to feel like I was contributing? Yes...but it really wasn't the best way for me to go about it. 

Then, I got pregnant.

Yes, on purpose.

Walking into someone else's house, with their strange smells and strange food, and changing someone else's kids' diapers, with their strange poop that I wouldn't just be cleaning off their bums but also their walls and themselves and their carpets....

yeah....I couldn't handle it. 

I started trying to bring my own lunches to their house everyday because I could no longer stomach their food. But I was not only constantly nauseous, but also constantly starving. So when I would run out of my own food (which I always. always did.) I'd be worse off than when I started. 

But I could only handle so much of that, too.

I gave it an honest try.

I stayed for 3 solid weeks before I told them I needed to quit as soon as possible.

It was not fair to anyone that I spend my days on their couch, curled up in a ball, or in the bathroom for far too long, or sitting on their kitchen floor with my knees pulled up to my chest while the boys watched through the baby gates. 

These boys deserved - and needed - better care than that.

 The next week was my last, and by October 1st I was a free woman.

In comparison to those 3 weeks, the last 5 have been much more tolerable.

Puking in the comfort of my own home,

not cooking when I just. can't. handle. it.

Spending all day in my PJs watching movies and reading books.

Sleeping (or some form of sleeping that involves me tossing and turning and going to the bathroom and drinking more water every half hour) for 12 hours every night.

It's just what I needed.

We found out the weekend of our 2nd anniversary, so it was such a sweet surprise. We celebrated by buying our baby's first outfit - one of each, cuz you never know what you're gonna get.

(Though Adam swears he knows its a boy. Go figure.)

We loved seeing the Ultrasound a few days ago. It is absolutely insane to watch this little BaHa (Baby Harrison) doing jumping jacks and sporadic kicks and punches and karate chops and not feel a thing. 

On stomach

This profile took awhile to get. Baby kept facing away from the camera and was being stubborn, but with the nurse's prodding and my laughing, we finally got him to turn over for a bit.

Cute little nose.

 This was taken two weeks ago, at 11 weeks.

Today I am either 13 or 14 weeks, depending on which due date we listen to - the LMP or the ultrasound. I like to just settle somewhere between the two.

So now I'm 13 1/2 weeks, which makes baby's arrival date somewhere between May 3 and May 10th.

We are so excited. And can I just say it feels SO good to get it out??? 

I hated hiding out over here. Not that I've felt much like blogging the last 8 weeks (notice?)....

And we've been trying to get Kaleo excited that he won't be the only child anymore in just 6 short months

...but he just won't hear any of it